What drives boredom will surprise you. Key points Boredom springs from an internal state of tension and a nagging wish to be saved from yourself. It often drives destructive decisions, such as unhealthy relationships or drug use. External stimulation may divert our attention from boredom, but boredom reappears because its true source is unresolved. Some […]
Sober coaches know better than anybody that addiction is a devastating and heartbreaking condition. For those struggling with substance abuse, or the loved ones who witness their descent, it can be an endless battle with the darker sides of our nature. It’s a struggle that far too many people are losing. According to the Centers […]
If you’re reading this post about a lifestyle change, chances are you feel dissatisfied with life. You may feel unhappy with your relationships, stuck in your career, or sick and tired of battling anxiety or depression. Yet, despite many efforts to improve your life, every day still feels uninspired. What do you do then? Common […]
You’re walking down the street, feeling great; the sun is shining, life is good. Suddenly, you recall something regretful you did. A jab of shame stabs at you; you shake your head and shudder in disbelief. “Why did that just happen? I was having such a good day!” You try to push the feeling away. You […]
Most people come to therapy because they’re disappointed in life. Things didn’t turn out as planned; hopes were dashed, relationships ended, careers stagnated. Is it possible to be happy when life doesn’t work out as you planned? How do you define happiness? While most folks would agree that happiness is a worthy goal, few agree […]
An essential part of recovery is recognizing and labeling the “voice of the addiction” inside your head. Though addiction can take many forms, the voice of addiction is startlingly the same. The following letter comprises many letters that people in recovery wrote to the addict’s voice inside them. While working in group therapy, in conjunction […]
Living with self-shame is like having a 24-hour critical inside your head. That toxic self-shaming voice seeks to limit you, hold you back, and defer growth. Left unchecked, it eats away at your self-worth, undermines your confidence, and can morph into crippling anxiety that destroys any chance of lasting happiness. Where does self-shaming come from? […]
If you’ve ever loved someone struggling with addiction, you know that there are few sufferings as agonizing. Addiction is a rollercoaster ride of impassioned highs and lows. It has the power to devastate relationships, rip apart families apart, and even end lives. What makes addiction so challenging? No matter how many times the addict emerges clean […]
If you’ve contacted a therapist, chances are you may be struggling with a toxic mindset. Things didn’t turn out the way you hoped; you may feel angry, misunderstood, hurt. Together with your therapist, you pick through your history, examine your friendships, scrutinize your family, spouse, or society. In the early stages of therapy, intense feelings […]
After grad school, I was assigned a clinical supervisor who was always stressed-out… She picked at her nails, took phone calls during our sessions, complained about the clinic’s financial problems, her busy schedule, health issues, and her aging cat. She constantly sighed, shifted in her seat, and shuffled through mounds of files on her desk, […]
